Clampdown
I'm thankful to have a guaranteed source of income every two weeks, but damn it is difficult walking into my job every other day for minimum wage. The new cook doesn't have a personality, a full two-thirds of my coworkers are painfully inept, management never has any idea what's going on, and a pair previously in charge of the food court (that demanded all baguettes be of the same size, shape, and color, and would send back those that didn't conform) have moved in to take power over us. They bare an eerie resemblance to Emperor Palpatine and Darth Vader; Mary Jane doesn't say much or show her face very often but her helper-boy Jeff is more than eager to speak his mind and trample employees as he sees fit. Being on the track to be a student manager leader, my minimum wage difficulties will be mitigated but I'll have more regular contact with the Sith lords.
At a manager meeting this past Friday morning (because Lord Vader doesn't want to work weekends) one of the topics discussed was students taking breaks. It's an understandable want for managers to know where student employees are and when they take breaks, but few of them were actually using the break sign out sheets. One of the student managers, who best fits Admiral Piett if we are to continue with the Star Wars analogy, proposed a solution to the problem: mandating break times. That is, a student manager comes up to an employee and tells them to take their break at that time. Given Central Foods' already pervasive problem with morale, I took it upon myself to shoot that down as best I could. Then Lord Vader chirped up, saying that we are managers and thus superior to the other employees. If they don't like us or our rules, tough. And if any employee resists the Imperial will, they are to be referred to him and he will deal with the matter. Moreover, according to him, we aren't even required to give them a break until they work four hours and one second, despite the line having been for months that a four hour shift entitles you to a 15 minute break.
After Vader left, student coordinator Admiral Ozzel and the rest of us managed to strike the compromise of having managers sign students out on break, but the student gets to choose when they take it. Palpatine and Vader have brought with them a sweeping set of new rules, including most notoriously mandating that students wear hairnets (previously you could bring your own hat), and charging us five cents for each hairnet. Rumor has it that according to the Ohio labor laws that Vader so loves, it's illegal to charge minimum wage employees for anything required at work. When I have the time I'll look into it as best I can; in the meantime I have an ample supply of hairnets I acquired back when they were still free.
A couple days ago my friends and I were lunching at the overpriced food court-thing and saw nearby the Emperor and her apprentice, taking their food into a little closed off room that full-time dining services employees use as a sort-of executive dining room. It took an impressive force of will to keep from 'dropping' my drink on them. Later on we saw Vader busing his boss's tray for her. How sweet.


24 Manifestos:
What would Nat X do?
Who?
whine
ain't work fun!
maybe a little hepatitis scare would liven things up.
bp - you always make me laugh :)
Woozie I forget how old you are, but I bartended throughout college and it was fun and lucrative.
Minimum wage jobs with no tips and no breaks will put you off ever wanting to leave the academic world. You will end up being a 40 year old Professional Student as long as you can find the granting!
Anon: White whine, please.
BP: It's entirely possible; they're not very safe there. One time one of the Africans lost an entire glove inside a muffin and didn't tell anyone. We only discovered it after the muffin baked and it was all fucked up.
Raspy: Bartending is on a list of things I'd like to learn at some point, but I don't turn 21 until this September.
In the meantime I've found out that I don't work minimum wage anymore. Turns out the pay raise for student managers is gradual; I got part of it when I became a student leader in training and I get the rest when I complete my training. Promotions and pay raises must be how the bourgeois tames unruly proletariat.
The company I work for salaries everyone so they don't have to pay over time, give breaks or track vacy time. They never review us so that means you can go forever without a raise. So when you do ask for a raise after lets say 3 years they treat you like you have asked them for your first born.
Yet, despite this poor management style (cause your last sentence is absolutely correct) they have zero turn over in employees. - who really knows the guilt factor placed my management on employees to solicit the maximum of effort with the least financial reward.
To be a good Manager you need to train in the school of "Mother guilt trips"
student managers.
Hahahaha, give them a title instead of a good raise for good work. Gotta love the Dilbert Zone.
I'm thankful that back in my days when I became a manager I was actually a manager and didn't have to kiss the ass of fifteen managers above me.
Yeah. All that power yet you wound up shitting in your yard and gumming oatmeal. Too bad your management skills didn't extend to your finances.
Poor baby
Me and you, LS. Me and you.
it took me almost two months but i finally healed this broken heart. I am NEVER falling in love again.
From now on i'm gonna be as cruel, bitter, and lonely as BBC and Leslie.
How goes the rear end woozie, considering heterosexuality yet? =P
From now on i'm gonna be as cruel, bitter, and lonely as BBC and Leslie.
Hey, fucker, I'm not that bitter, I'm just wise enough to avoid most women.
Who taught me to be that wise? Women did.
I'm going boating. :-)
And I'm damn sure not lonely, got lots of friends, more than I have time to visit.
But like V asked, how is the butt fucking going?
Man, get a good pocket pussy and an imagination.
A few good sex aids and an imagination saves one from fucked up relationships with either sex.
At that point they can just be your friends, folks you know and bullshit with some.
Haha... Billy said "sex aids".
Rip and tear, Simba. Rip and tear.
i think bbc and leslie should get a reality show.
shitting in the yard and gumming oatmeal would attract a lot of viewers.
I'm sure you're right.
Omar, your Canuck vid doesn't play in The Land of the Free.
Could you get a job somewhere else?
There has to be something open and what you're doing now almost doesn't sound worth the money.
This coming Monday, Canada will either become a lot more free or a lot less. Our GWB clone was on track to a majority, but now it looks like our friends in Quebec may change things in a big way. So there's some cause for optimism.
Thank fuck for the people of Quebec. 8 million shining stars in a northern galaxy of 5 watt bulbs. Je t'aime.
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